Secondly...

Album: ¡Dos! 

Artist: Green Day

Label: Reprise

Release date: November 9, 2012

Peak chart position/sales: (AUS) #10 (UK) #10 (US) #9

RATING: 2/5 stars

After the classic style of Uno!, Dos! is a wallop of genre confusion. It's positively retro. Opening number See You Tonight is a sentimental cluster of close harmony, sans distortion, while aggressively-titled Fuck Time is actually a delightful rock n' roll romp (with lyrics so overt that they finally cross the line from distasteful to hilarious). Listen to the chorus, then bend your ear to this and you'll see what I mean by retro. Apart from that, the cheerful - dare I say - almost cute groove of Stray Heart (I know...Green Day just mastered 'cute', what the?!) and straight rockin' Lady Cobra are drowning in an album of filler tracks and lame titles (Wow! That's Loud...Ashley...Amy...*yawning*). It's a pity, after all, the retro influence would be a welcome surprise if it wasn't so uninspired. If you don't believe me, listen to The Beatles' All I've Got To Do after album closer Amy. I rest my case.

Is it worth my $$$? - Not really. Simple as that.

Listen to: Fuck Time, Lady Cobra

First things first

Unfairly or not, I've always lumped Green Day in with Good Charlotte, Blink 182 and the rest of the light-rock/punk bands I listen to when I'm in the mood for mindless head-banging. That's not to discount their musicality of course - there is an art to creating music that inspires violent rocking of the cranium and there is something about no-holds-barred power chords and flippant swearing that inspires respect (for its sheer enthusiasm at least!). Further than American Idiot however - whose musical significance and enjoyability I will happily agree with - my Green Day experience is pretty thin on the ground.

Enter a lovely young reader whose devotion to this very band inspired me to dip into a collection of albums that would normally have passed me by (yup, that's you Jesse!), and you find me pressing play to the first of Green Day's latest offerings, ¡Uno!...

Album: ¡Uno! 
Artist: Green Day
Label: Reprise
Release date: September 21, 2012
Peak chart position/sales: (AUS) #3, (US) #2, (UK) #2 Gold

RATING: 3/5 stars

Green Day have mellowed. No, they haven't grown beards and unplugged their guitars (heaven forbid they ever do), but the ageing process is showing.  Armstrong hollers "Carpe diem the battle cry /Are we all too young to die?" with overtones of midlife crisis. Sweet 16 harks back to the first meeting of a spouse with happy nostalgia and rough romanticism. Kids are mentioned. There's a booming ode called Oh Love that goes for over 5 minutes. And the music is a little...well, safe.

"Safe" of course means plenty of rocking good tunes, raucous vocals, visceral lyrics ("Hey! I wanna get inside of you /I wanna crack your cranium delirium /on the lower east side of your mind") and a hella lot of power chords. This is Green Day as you've heard them before, with a few forgettable tracks in between and many that drag a little. Nuclear Family follows the same musical formula as American Idiot to pleasing effect, Angel Blue and Let Yourself Go are standard rockers, while overtly violent (but undeniably funky) Kill The DJ toes the line of tiresome with its repeated tagline.

But each track begins with such reckless drums, or provocatively chugging guitar distortion, or both going hell-for-leather all at once, that the slightly stretched final chorus of the previous number pales into insignificance as you adjust your dance groove to fit the infectious beat of the current song. At best,  this is a rehash of what Green Day does best, at worst, a slightly uninspired album whose simplicity wears thin at the ends. None of it, however, stops Uno! from being loud, feckless and rather crazy fun. Turn the volume up, please.

Is it worth my $$$? - New to Green Day? Go back to Dookie. If the charts are anything to go by, Uno! is the best of this latest trilogy, but Green Day fans probably already have them all in their pocket anyway.

Listen to: Let Yourself Go, Sweet 16

Coming up... Dos!

Les Mis: the review

The music of Les Miserables has always walloped me in the heart something awful. The Beethoven of the musical theatre genre, its magnitude and social significance is a moving combination of epic proportions. I was rather surprised (and I won't lie, very flattered) in the amount of interest in my opinion towards this latest endeavour of director Tom Hooper, (though it is quite obviously a film and not an album) so here it is, for all those who asked...

*SPOILER ALERT*

Les Miserables (2012)
Director: Tom Hooper
Starring: Hugh Jackman, Russell Crowe, Anne Hathaway etc. etc.

RATING: 3/5 stars

It is my humble opinion that Tom Hooper likes to play it safe. Producing a winner with the crowd-pleasing The King's Speech was never going to be difficult, and likewise, should all else fall flat on its face, the incredible score of Les Miserables was always going to save the day. It is tempting to bestow a generous 4.5/5 star rating, simply because this was an exhilaratingly intense, deeply stirring cinematic experience. I loved it! It's just that a lot of that love is directed at the music itself, and not necessarily the making of the film.

That's not to say I'm not sympathetic. Theatre-to-film adaptations are fraught with difficulty. For a start, you have to find screen actors who can sing, and, in the case of Les Mis, sing pretty damn well. In addition to this the director must face the challenge of conveying a story not designed for the subtleties of film. Stage productions are not meant to be put under the microscope - not just because stage make-up is garish and hideous at close proximity, but because drama requires elbow room to accommodate its sweeping gestures. Unfortunately, it is here that we meet my first criticism: the camera trampled all over the performer's personal space.

Although the scenic cinematography was spot-on, it's clear Hooper has absolutely no idea how to film theatrical solos. Opting for intense facial close-ups almost every time, the mise en scene invaded the 'larger than life' stage aesthetic that is so necessary to the large scale of Les Mis.  Keeping the actors' nostril-hair in sight, the shots jump awkwardly from angle to angle in a nervous effort to maintain some sort of cinematic interest - in fact upstaging the number instead. Constantly cramming huge solos into small spaces, Hooper creates a claustrophobia that had me wanting to punch Anne Hathaway halfway through I Dreamed A Dream and wishing that the clearly amazing set in many other scenes was actually...you know...in focus?! I'd kind of like to slap Hooper for not backing off and trusting the music a bit more. Because it was pretty spectacular.

Les Mis cinematography: rivalling The Bold & The Beautiful.

I'll admit it: Russell Crowe and Anne Hathaway weren't high on my list of 'Actors I want to hear sing'. They weren't even on it. But did they prove me wrong? Happily, yes. The one thing I will praise unreservedly is the casting, which is superb. I was suitably impressed with (and yes, surprised at) the vocal ability of the cast - lay off the disappointment you Hugh Jackman critics! That the actors were able to go about their usual job, seemingly unfazed by the addition of singing, was a credit to their professionalism and talent.

Essentially however, this was not an instinctively musical production. The sung-through nature of Les Mis showed cracks in the actors' musicality as they awkwardly rushed recitatives with little emotion, favouring the explosive sustained notes over nuance. And by some weird phenomenon (I won't blame this one on Hooper, but it better not have been intentional) no one, no one, NO ONE seemed able to hold a last note long enough. There are times when this is effective, or even appropriate, in a musical; but not when it makes the end of every number about as exhilarating as a damp rag.

Luckily, everything else in between was spot on - and speaking of damp rags, let's talk tears. Yes, I nearly came a cropper when Aaron Tveit - sorry, Enjolras - turned to face his death (if that scene had lasted 2 more seconds I would have lost it); and I got a lump in my throat when Javert bestowed his medal on the dead Gavrouche.

Shush your criticism: Jackman was amazing.

But it wasn't until right at the end that I had a quiet weep, at Jean Valjean's dying scene. Not particularly because of Jackman's sensitive portrayal of a broken man (and definitely not because of Hathaway's Fontaine singing over his shoulder and leading him into the clouds), but because I have always had a profound admiration for the fierce faith and hope of Jean Valjean's character.

So I suppose, somehow, this film managed to make that come to life for me. Which is quite enough to seal its success in my books.

The 'Psy'chology of Gangnam Style

Ladies and gentlemen, I have a confession to make: Gangnam Style is growing on me.

I know, I know, Psy's horse-riding dance craze should be long dead, right? But it seems I'm not the only one succumbing to the K-pop hit. As of Friday, the official film clip managed to clock up 1 billion views. That's right folks: more than Justin Beiber's Baby (and yes, it grieves me that that is the appropriate comparison).

I was one of the first (okay...maybe one of the first 100 000...) to help Psy towards his 1 billion views, after hearing the phrase "gangnam style" being tossed around on social media. Uncharacteristically, I decided to keep up with the times and investigate.

I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn't a chubby Bond-wannabe hollering "AYYYYY SEXY LADIES" while executing dubious dance moves and being straddled by a groin-thrusting man in an elevator. More than a little disturbed, I vowed to run screaming the next time I heard it, but the fast-rising ubiquity of Psy and his deranged antics meant that this would have forced me into hermitage.

Source.

Some 5 months later, I've heard the blasted thing at least twice a week - in supermarkets, clothes stores, TV advertisements, parties, pubs, gyms - and with every encounter my brain screams "WHY?!!! Why is a fat man in sunglasses responsible for the most popular dance tune of 2012?" And, more importantly, why the hell am I starting to like this ear worm of a song, that I should loathe on principle if nothing else?

That's right. One fine Gangnam Style-inflicted day, I caught myself thinking "Well this is kind of fun".

You see, successful singles are all about timing and tension - and Gangnam Style is an impeccable tease of a song.  Of course it was going to go viral. The bouncy beat hooks us in with its dance potential (who cares what Psy's rambling on about anyway?), then acquires a manically escalating pulse in a sort-of aural version of strobe lights, which in turn explodes into...

...

"OPPA GANGNAM STYLE".

Admit it, you just sang that line in your head.

Don't get me wrong; the whiny beat gets horribly grating, I wouldn't spend a dollar adding this one to my iTunes library, and the weirdness of the music video is NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT OKAY. I'm still among those who groan and wring my hands when the first pulsations of the opening bars permeate a party or pub...

But it gets harder and harder not to sing along.

Christmas cheese...sorry, cheer

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a singer in possession of a smooth voice, must produce a Christmas album. And even those who sing like sandpaper (*coughsRodStewartcoughs*), if they have made a favourable name for themselves, cannot escape the expectation that they will lend their talents to the cheesiest songs in the Western canon - and donate part of the proceeds to charity into the bargain.

Nevertheless, I will say it now: I LOVE good Christmas music. The operative word there being good. I cannot, for instance, fathom the desire to spend $22.99 on Justin Bieber's Under The Mistletoe (Deluxe Version) (which, although it includes some pleasantly bearable tunes, is decidedly killed by Busta Rhymes' atrocious addition, a stale Mariah Carey revival and incredibly fussy vocals). Or the hype around A Partridge Family Christmas Card...oh wait, sorry, there was no hype.

So what is good Christmas music, you ask? Stylistically, jazz is always going to win - there's something about its smooth potential for instantly festive background music that beats Cyndi Lauper's in-your-face rendition of "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree" or ANY version of Wham's whingy "Last Christmas", everytime. But so long as the heart's in it, singers can get away with a lot...how else can one explain the infectious zeal of Mariah Carey's ubiquitous Merry Christmas? If it all seems like too much of a minefield however, here's 10 albums I've deemed safe to listen to during the holiday season: complete with cheese warnings, should your taste in cheer differ from mine.

#10. The Killers

(RED) CHRISTMAS EP (2011)

Not much cheese on this one, but not too much cheer either. While it eventually lightens up with the country rock of "The Cowboys' Christmas Ball", this EP addresses the heavier side of Christmas. Angst features, not least of all in a consideration of Joseph's situation regarding the impregnation of his virgin wife. However, for those who prefer a slightly sardonic view of Santa and the Christmas story and a little Elton John with their Flowers, this is the collection for you. Proceeds go to (RED) as well, so it's not a waste of money, even if you decide to hate the songs post-purchase.

Listen to: Don't Shoot Me Santa

#9. The Wiggles

WIGGLY, WIGGLY CHRISTMAS (1996)

I kid you not. I'm sorry, but Christmas just isn't Australian without The Wiggles. And 1990's Wiggles at that! Sure, the harmonies mightn't quite mask the very ordinary timbre of the vocals, but there are few artists who can fill a Christmas album with originals and live to tell the tale. The rock n' roll of "Wiggly Wiggly Christmas" is enough to inspire coordination in even the most reluctant of dancers, while old favourite "Ding Dong Merrily On High" is a cheerful instrumental break for brass and synth.  Admittedly, it is only socially acceptable to listen to this album with a 5yo or two in the house, but come on...we've all succumbed to the infectiously fun actions of "Go Santa Go"...haven't we?

Listen to: Go Santa Go

#8. The Idea Of North

THIS CHRISTMAS (2012)

While most artists struggle against typecasting, Christmas albums are not the place to expand one's musical style. And with a sound as good as The Idea Of North have down, why would you bother changing? Sweetly jazzy solos, ad lib instrumental effects, a dazzling mesh of close harmony and, of course, a whacking good dose of James Morrison: it's that selfsame sound that The Idea Of North bring to this collection, with the expertise we've come to expect of them. Calypso carol "Mary's Boy Child" receives the "Mas Que Nada" treatment  to stunning effect and "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" swings with jaunty vocals and a Morrison solo. The album has a predominantly mellow tone however, with lesser-known ballad-style carols making up much of the second half. Kudos for the non-creepy, non-cheesey album cover, too.

Listen to: Mary's Boy Child

#7. James Morrison

CHRISTMAS (2007)

I love jazz, I love (good) Christmas music...how could I not love James Morrison's Christmas collection? The man has perfected jazz. The track listing includes comprehensive coverage of the best Christmas carols, steering towards a distinctly traditional feel with "We Three Kings", "Away In A Manger," "Silent Night" and "The First Noel". "Mary's Boy Child" provides an opportunity for Morrison to really break out in swinging style, ensuring the album doesn't fall into drowsy lethargy. Gently hissing snare and electric guitar solos sit atop a polished jazz band and once Emma Pask's sultry vocals are added to the mix the combination is complete.

Listen to: It Came Upon A Midnight Clear

#6. Bing Crosby

CHRISTMAS CLASSICS (2006)

For traditional Christmas ear-fare you really can't go past Crosby. If you don't melt under the influence of such smooth vocals you are a rock in human form. 'Nuff said.

Listen to: White Christmas (Crosby AND Sinatra...winning)

#5. Kenny G

MIRACLES: THE HOLIDAY ALBUM (1994)

A frizzy-haired saxophonist eyeing off a naked baby probably takes the cake as the creepiest Christmas album cover I've ever seen (though Olivia Newton-John and John Tavolta sure as hell tried to take that prize this year), but Kenny G's 8x platinum Christmas album Miracles is one of the most beautiful instrumental collections you'll find. Perfect for when you're sick of hearing the same old lyrics over and over but still feel it necessary to set that Christmas mood, the unobtrusive saxophone arrangements drift peacefully amidst brushed snare, rippling piano and sentimental strings.

Listen to: The Little Drummer Boy

#4. Cast of Jersey Boys
SEASONS GREETINGS (2011)

Even tribute bands can't escape the clutches of Christmas commercialism. After reviving the magic of Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons in the Broadway hit Jersey Boys, members from the various international casts combined to sing their way through a celebration of carols - in four-part harmony, of course. Shamelessly plagiarising drum beats and bass grooves from original Four Seasons hits, this album cleverly weaves traditional Christmas carols with a blatantly "Jersey Boys" sound. Medleys abound, with most tracks including two or more carols in one. "Little Drummer Boy" ditches the disco (though not the retro keyboard) for a more dramatic mesh of harmony, while the traditionally jazzy "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" was a Tony Award Winner. There's plenty of cheese on this one, but for those of us who were wearing out the repeat button with the original show soundtrack, this album comes as a more than satisfactory way to continue the obsession cheer through the holidays.

Listen to: Jingle Bell Rock (Australian cast)

#3. Diana Krall

CHRISTMAS SONGS (2005)

Again with the jazz! And it's hard to beat Krall's smokey vocals, coupled with the hot brass of The Clayton-Hamiliton Jazz Orchestra. Sticking with a safe repertoire of the old familiar favourites, Krall's voice takes centre-stage in a delightfully planned program of peppy and chilled renditions. It grieves me that this album has existed for 5 Christmases and this is the first time I've ever listened to it in its entirety, but better late than never. This one's going to be on repeat.

Listen to: Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

#2. Mariah Carey

MERRY CHRISTMAS (1994)

There is no in-between with this album: you either love it or hate it with equal and unequivocal passion. As it was a household holiday staple during my childhood I am in the first camp and I make no apologies for this fact. For me, this album rings in the Christmas season like nothing else and I wear it as a badge of pride that I am not one of the shoppers who has to beat a hasty retreat from Westfield at the first notes of "All I Want For Christmas Is You". Angst-ridden originals aside though, Carey's powerhouse vocals produce stunning deliveries that most covers can't poke a stick at - and the lush, gospel-inspired arrangements of traditional carols "Joy To The World" and "Hark The Herald Angels Sing"(among others) seriously raised the bar for Christmas albums.

Listen to: O Holy Night

#1. Michael Buble

LET IT SNOW (2007)

Before he released the 'meh' that was Christmas, Michael Buble had a really beautiful holiday album in him. Sadly, it never grew longer than an EP, but Let It Snow is worth playing on repeat in favour of its longer cousin. Stunningly lush orchestral arrangements are reminiscent of the vintage class of Crosby and Sinatra, and topped by sensitive vocals from Buble, every song is a winner here. The only thing lacking is a mince pie and a glass of red.

Listen to: Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow!

A Prickly Introduction

Album: The Incident
Artist: Porcupine Tree
Label: Roadrunner/Victor
Release date: September 14, 2009
Peak chart position/sales: Billboard Rock Albums #7, UK #23, Billboard 200 #25, ARIAs #35

RATING: 2.5/5 stars.

Those who know me (or who have read enough of my reviews) will confirm that I have an intense dislike of contrived music and bands. Therefore a band that started as a joke, with no serious intention of pursuing fame and money, bodes well in my books. Even so, the sheer size of The Incident - with its double CD release of lengthy experimental rock tracks - requires my Beatles-favouring brain to apply a little discipline. Because to call Porcupine Tree a "rock band" is a cruel underestimation of their musical scope. Steering much closer to progressive and post rock than the tamer original genre, this music is just so damn BIG. Unlike my previous prog rock experiences however, Porcupine Tree sit somewhere between purely instrumental soundscapes and the more accessible rock genre - a mix I had not previously encountered and one that was not, perhaps, as effective as I hoped.

It is perhaps one of the most irritating/impressive traits of prog rock that the volume must be constantly adjusted so as to: a) protect one's eardrums b) preserve one's good relationship with the neighbours and c) try and figure out whether silence is being used creatively, or whether some soft ambience has been lost in your speaker-and-neighbour-caring volume caution. But I digress. The first explosive chords of concept-album-like introduction "Occam's Razor" can do nothing else but blow your mind (and your speakers, if you're not careful) with unbridled distortion, but then it all stops and Steven Wilson's dreamlike vocals take centre stage ala rock ballad in "Kneel and Disconnect". I can't quite decide whether this is a startlingly effective contrast, or a boring letdown. The overall effect is one of a band stuck awkwardly between catering to the rock genre and being true to the experimental style or their creative priority. Or else they're just not skilled enough to merge the two effectively.

Whether it is because they pull out everything they have too soon, or whether it is due to the general lack of direction and musical purpose in individual tracks, Porcupine Tree failed to impress me after about four pieces. They all start to blur into a never-ending, ever-changing stream of sound and deadpan vocals. Perhaps this was the musical intent of the composers, but as Wilson sings in "The Seance": "give me something new". Some tracks, like the sweetly nostalgic "The Yellow Windows Of The Evening Train" evoke pleasant soundscapes amongst the clatter of experimentalism; likewise, the minimalist influences of "Time Flies" create a jugging bed of rhythm for soaring electronica. But the danger with all experimentalism - irrespective of genre - is getting lost in an array of blistering solos and spacey ambience.

Things change on disc two however, when Porcupine Tree seem to find a groove to settle into and really rock it out. It's less prog, but better structured. Things get whackier by the second in "Bonnie The Cat", with guitars letting loose and Wilson chanting disjointed lyrics like "I hold your birth control to ransom". "Black Dahlia" is a dose of John Lennon-esque experimentation, but self-indulgent rambling returns on 7'34" closing track "Remember Me Lover". But ironically perhaps, I won't find this album that memorable. Moments of fearless music-making provide a large dose of adrenalin at times, but the exhilaration is carelessly managed and fails to harness the true power of musical momentum that successful prog rock relies so heavily upon.

Listen to: The Blind House, Time Flies, Bonnie The Cat

Is it worth my $$$? - While this is not an album that I'd be inclined to listen to in its entirety again, I am tempted by standout tracks...there is some fantastic prog on there, despite my overall criticism.

Amen To That

Album: Whatever And Ever Amen
Artist: Ben Folds Five
Label: 550
Released: March 18, 1997
Peak chart position/sales: (AUS) #8, Platinum (CAN) Gold (UK) #30 (US) #42, Platinum

RATING: 4/5 stars

Ben Folds Five is one of those bands that has never really been on my radar - one of those names that sparked my curiosity, if not the motivation to actually listen to them. They disbanded right when I was starting to discover my musical taste, but their recent reunion and new album has made them a lot more present of late. Cue: curiosity and a friend encouraging me to listen to their earlier stuff.  Confusingly consisting of three members, not five, the alt. rock trio formed in 1993 and released three albums before splitting. Whatever and Ever Amen was by far their highest selling release, and as it turns out, even I had heard their hit single "Brick"...

If there's going to be one thing that wins me over, it's genuine instrumental expertise - even more so when it's on my own instrument. So it was a pleasant surprise to discover the prominence of the piano in this album: sitting somewhere in between Beatles rock rhythms and Cat Empire-like jazzy virtuosic irreverence, the confident riffs that underpin these songs are always an inspired contribution to the musical content. The whole album reeks of a band that is totally focussed on their art - not radio time - yet somehow manages not to sacrifice accessibility along the way. Confidently lengthy tracks peak at 15:42 with the beautifully musing "Selfless Cold and Composed", yet the haunting tale of a man and his mentally unstable wife that makes up "Cigarette" is finished in less time than it takes to roll one.

Good humour is another tick in my boxes and BF5 hit this one right on the head as well. From the rebellious throwaway of an album title to the high energy repeats of "kissmyassgoodbye" on opening track "One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces", Fold's unsubtle voice drawls its way through a wealth of lyrical flippancy. The blasting cabaret jazz of "Steven's Last Night In Town" paints a witty picture of a charming foreign friend who overstays his welcome ("We thought he was gone/ But now he's come back again/ Last week it was funny/ But now the joke's wearing thin") and the daggy ire of "Song For The Dumped" no doubt resonates with every fella who regrets buying her dinner ("Give me my money back you bitch/ And don't forget to give me back my black T-shirt").

Few albums capture the adrenalin of musical communication between players, that moment when creative sparks fly. Whatever and Ever Amen begs to differ, bursting with tangible vibe and energy. A delightful romp of inspired improvisation, rockin' riffs, undisguised catharsis and the sound of a band having a hell of a lot of fun with it all. Definitely one of the better things to have come out of the nineties.

Listen to: One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces, Selfless Cold and Composed, Steven's Last Night In Town

Is it worth my $$$? - I'm not gonna lie: I'd love this in my music collection. Perfect for rocking out on road trips.